Class of '95

So my high school reunion is coming up in August. I have not decided if I am going to go. I mean the tickets are $70. It could just be the pms talking but, I am not sure I feel comfortable spending $70 to see a bunch of people that I did not connect with when I saw them for free on a daily basis. On the other hand I am curious. Anyway if I do decide to go there are a few things I need to do to prepare. The short list:

• Loose 15-no, 20 pounds.
• Get a tan.
• Get boob job. Purchase Wonder bra.
• Win the lottery.
• Catch a tiger by his toe.

The long list involves the details of my plans for taking over the world therefore I shall not be publishing it. But if anyone knows where I can get a stick of dynamite and a donkey on the cheap please email me. Also I may need to hire a Japanese midget. Thanks.